After The Game
by xaiver
Summary: Yes, the couples may seem nice on The Newlywed Game, but... What about when its over?


A/N: Newlywed Game belongs to whoever owns it. Makes sense.  
  
  
  
  
  
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"Okay! Debbie and Tom! You have five points, good for you!" The Host Guy yelled over enthusiastically. "Now here's the twenty-five point bonus question! What was the last thing you loaded?!"  
  
Tom adjusts his collar on his chubby face and says, "The apartment."  
  
"Ummm… okay. No! That's wrong! The answer was…"  
  
Debbie turns her card over with a disappointed look on her face and it says, The Car.  
  
"Now that makes sense! Sorry, you lose! Okay, Frieda and Bill! Bonus question! What was the last thing you loaded?!"  
  
"The car!" Bill yells a little too excited.  
  
"Nope, nope, nope! It was…"  
  
A Gun, Frieda's card read and she hit Bill over the head with it as everyone on the show does.  
  
"Wow! That scares me! Now, Lauren and Joe! You have 15 points! What was the last thing you loaded?!"  
  
Joe smiles to himself and says, "The trunk in the car."  
  
"And she said…"  
  
The Car, Laurens card reads and she hugs and kisses Joe on the cheek as everyone that doesn't have marital problems does.  
  
"Yes! You're right! Now you have 40 points!"  
  
"Yay!"  
  
"Shut up! Now, Kayla and Charlie! You also have 15 points. You can tie this up! What was the last thing you loaded, Charlie?!"  
  
"The car!"  
  
"Oh! Sorry! Kayla said…"  
  
Air gun, and hits him over the head with the card. Again. Deja vue.  
  
"Okay! Again, that scares me! What's with the guns? And what the hell is an air gun?! I have no idea! Hey! Guess what?! Lauren and Joe! You're our winners! YAY!" And he throws up his cards and starts to do an embarrassing jig as the mysterious voice named Bob starts to name off their prizes.  
  
"And you get… A toaster! Yay! And we'll throw in… my underpants! Wowsies!"  
  
And of course Lauren and Joe think this is the best thing ever since now they can toast their bread.  
  
"And good luck to ALL our couples! And this is… The Newlywed Game! See ya later!" And the clip ends, leaving only black on the T.V.  
  
But back in the studio, something different is happening…  
  
"Stupid!" Debbie yells. "Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! God, I hate you! That could've been OUR toaster! STUPID!"  
  
Now, Tom was just as disappointed as Debbie since he loves toast too. Especially with a little jelly and butter… Margarine is good too. And some marmalade… Yum, yum.  
  
The 'happy' couple walked out to their car yelling at each other and fantasizing about toast.  
  
"Stupid!" Wow, deja vue again. "How could you? Remember the gun?! Remember?!"  
  
"If you don't shut up soon I'm gonna be using the gun pretty soon!" Bill yelled back at his 'lover'.  
  
"ARGH!" Frieda grabbed a nearby chair and threw it at Bill. Unfortunately, she missed and almost hit the Host Guy.  
  
"Whoa, there!" He yelled as the chair almost hit him. He turned around after taking one last look in his mirror. "What's the matter?"  
  
"STUPID!"  
  
Frieda stormed out of the building, uttering curses under her breath.  
  
Bill and the Host Guy looked at each other and sighed.  
  
"Women."  
  
"Stupid woman!" Another familiar voice, Charlie, yelled. "Air gun?! How can I even load that? I don't have one! I don't even know what it is! Stupid!"  
  
"Wow, we should have gotten these people a Thesaurus instead!" Bob, the mysterious voice, announced.  
  
"Shut up!" Kayla yelled, gave the finger to the ceiling and kicked Charlie in the family jewels. "You stupid! Stupid! Stupid!"  
  
"Thesaurus! Thesaurus!"  
  
"SHUT UP!"  
  
"Sorry."  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, at Lauren and Joe's apartment…  
  
"Give me the toaster!" Lauren tried to yank the toaster out of Joe's hands but missed and fell down flat on her face. "Ow!"  
  
"NOOOO!" Joe screamed. "My toast! MINE! MINE!" Yum, yum.  
  
"GAHHHH!!!!!" Lauren jumped on Joe and started biting and scratching.  
  
"Ahh! You stupid woman! Get off me!" Joe yelled and tried defending his toast privileges. He poked Lauren in the eye and started running out of the kitchen, toaster in hand.  
  
"Oh no you don't! Get back here!" Lauren grabbed the butter and threw it at Joe.  
  
"TOAST!" Joe ran out the door, screaming bloody murder all the way down the street.  
  
"Damn him…" Lauren whispered. "Oh well," And she reached into her pocket and pulled out a pair of gigantic underpants. "Still got these…"  
  
  
  
  
  
~*~ 


End file.
